Slang Editorial

2006-08-24T09:29:00.000-07:00

SHOWS, SHOWS, SHOWS

Peep the pictures here

Monday, July 24th & Tuesday, July 25th: Jurassic 5 w/ the legendary X-Clan at the House Of Blues on Sunset
hob.com
I'll be at the Tuesday night show...COP THE NEW ALBUM FEEDBACK THAT DAY, TOO!!!
UPDATE: One word: DDDAAAAAAMMMNNN!!! I saw these dudes rock it at a $5 show a couple of years back and I thought that was one of the best shows I'd ever seen, but this topped it ten-fold. To say it was amazing would be an understatement...J5 really are performers in every sense of the word. They rock the crowd just about better than anyone I've EVER seen...and I've been to A LOT of shows. From Nu-Mark's AMAZING abilities with the wheels, to even rockin' with kid's toys, to the whole crew playin' drums from those old desks in high school (you had to see it...) to Tom Green rockin' the mic. Yeah, you read that right...TOM GREEN!!! It was an unbelievable set that clocked in at just under 2 hours, and I'm sorry to rub it in, but if you weren't there you missed a true experience. They'll be around the country, so I urge anyone to catch them live at least once. Even my boy, who is one of the hardest dudes to impress, told me as soon as we walked out "Man...that was an experience." Much props to J5 for comin' back and takin' out the doubters. Hip Hop missed y'all :)

Wednesday, July 26th: Sabac Red (of now broken-up Non Phixion) at the Knitting Factory. He's one of the coolest cats I've met tho, and he puts on a good show.
knittingfactory.com
UPDATE: I didn't make this show. My bad, 'Bac...but life got in the way. Maybe next time...

Friday, July 28th: I'll be at the Dodger game (yes, AGAIN! And I HATE the fuckin' Dodgers...) and then we're rollin' to peep my homie Art (yeah, yeah!!!) of Technicali, LD & Ariano, Declaime and the one and only LMNO
musicplustv.com
UPDATE: The Dodger game pretty much sucked (it was a route...and I HATE seein' those fags win...), so my homie and cousin had a fun time rubbin' it in the whole time to me and my bro. Oh well...the show was ill, at least. My boy Art set it off, LD & Ariano did their thang and LMNO fuckin' killed it, as always. Big ups to my main man KeyKool for chillin' with the homies...U DA MAN!!! And thanks to the ladies that kept the drinks comin'...open bars are the shit. See y'all at the next Friday Effect...

Saturday, July 29th: Roc C, Oh No, DJ Romes, Kankick, Literates and DILATED PEOPLES at the Majestic Ventura Theatre. Kind of a drive, but it'll be worth it :)
asrentertainment.com
UPDATE: OH MAN...WHAT CAN I SAY? It had been a minute since we'd seen Dilated actually headline a show, and in that time it became easy to forget just how ill their live shows are. We were all reminded just why they're one of the illest cats out right now. I wish the crowd would have been larger (the place SHOULD have sold out...), but the dudes up in the front that started the mosh pit were the shit. I was sore as fuck the next day, but it was worth that AND the hour and a half that we drove to get to Ventura. Dilated had a nice mix of old and new stuff. As long as they did "The Platform" and "Ear Drums Pop", I was in pure heaven. They're still one of the best acts to catch live. Anyone readin' this can catch them at Rock The Bells on Saturday. Their set won't be as long, but it'll still be ill...half short, twice strong. Keep makin' L.A. proud, fellas.

Monday, July 31st: The legendary Boot Camp Clik at the Knitting Factory
knittingfactory.com
UPDATE: Why can't a fuckin' Hip Hop show ever run on time? Well...maybe not ALWAYS, but still. Grime was ill, and some of the other acts were cool. But I was there to catch B.C.C. and they didn't get on 'til well after 12:30...A NIGGA'Z GOTTA BE AT WORK THE NEXT DAY!!! If their set had started at 12:00 like it was SUPPOSED to, I woulda had time to catch Black Moon. But an emergency sprung it's ugly head and I had to bounce early...I didn't even get to see Buckshot :( Tek & Steele set it off, tho. And they got so much classic material, it's ridiculous. It was still an aight show. Big ups to the peeps I met last night. It's always good to be among other Hip Hop junkies. Respect...

Saturday, August 5th: Do you really need to ask? If you ain't at ROCK THE BELLS, THEN YOU AIN'T SHIT!!! Don't sleep or you'll miss the train. Self Scientific, Visionaries, Supernatural, Dilated Peoples, De La Soul, Immortal Technique, Mos Def & Kweli, and mutha fuckin' Witty, Unpredictable, Talent And Natural Game!!!
rockthebells.net
UPDATE: Peep my previous blog post for my recap of an insane day...

Saturday, August 19th: Lord willing, I will be in Philly to peep the Around The Way Jam...Boot Camp Clik, Jedi Mind Tricks, RAKIM!!! and Wu-Tang...AGAIN!!!
ticketmaster.com
I don't have all the info yet. I know, I know...it's a long way to go for a show, but it's gonna be a birthday gift to myself :) I just hope I can make it...
UPDATE: Well...like I said from the beginning, "If time and money permit..." I would go to these shows. Money didn't permit this time, so unfortunately I never made it to Philly. I had so much other shit goin' on that I never really got to plan this trip out the way I would have liked. I really hated missin' out on this show, but I figured that all the acts on this bill I've either seen in the last couple of months or I will see pretty damn soon around So Cal. It's all good. Maybe next year :)

-Rm

2006-08-16T21:26:00.000-07:00

ALONE AGAIN...I'M NOT SOBER...1 YEAR OLDER

Well, technically I am sober. Unfortunately, I do find myself alone though...but that's a line from Kev Brown and I thought I'd bite it since it fit my situation right about now. You just get to those points in life where you get all contemplative and shit. And the last couple of years, I've come to find, it seems to spring up on (or around) my birthday.

It's funny how the years just fly by. At this point in my life, they've all become a blur...one just seems to blend into the next. But it's all in how old you feel, and I honestly don't feel my age. Maybe that's a bad thing...

I still feel like I have so much accomplish and alot to look forward to. A few years ago I would have said that I knew pretty much the direction that my life was goin' in. But life has a cruel way of throwin' some curve balls at you. I've come to learn that the saying "Never say never" is VERY true. Sometimes you just don't know where life is gonna take you.

I feel sometimes like the people around me expect more out of me. And I don't blame them one bit. I look at the things I've done (or haven't done) and I'll admit that I should probably find myself in a different situation than the one I'm in. But I hate using the word "regret" and I honestly don't "regret" anything I've done up to this point in life. Could I have done certain things differently? OF COURSE. But although everybody don't like me, I think that I'm a good person at heart and I wouldn't be who I am if my road would have taken a different direction. Besides, some people just don't know how to appreciate me :)

Some people are just late bloomers, and I think I fit that category perfectly. I really don't care what certain people expect of me. I know in my heart what I'm capable of and I'm gonna do everything to make those hopes and dreams come to fruition. Like LMNO said, "I take my time...I don't let time take me."

I got so much on my plate right now...so many ideas that I want to make reality...so many projects that I put on hold for one reason or another. I really, sincerely feel rejuvenated right now. I have so much that I want to do and I feel like I have my whole life still in front of me, and it doesn't matter to me that I'm gettin' around to 'em this late in life. That's partly why I still feel so young. It's all about how old you feel on the inside.

I sincerely feel that it's never too late in life. I look up to my father more than just about anybody on this planet. If I could be half the man he is, I'll be alright. He's one of the funniest and most intelligent persons you could ever hope to meet. And he just recently took care of some issues that he had with himself...it made me so proud to see him pull himself up and handle his business. The only person that ever held him back was himself, but he stuck with it and he's doin' fine now.

So I asked myself, "Why can't I do the same?" I can...and I will.

I know I said to never say "never" earlier, but......

IT'S NEVER TOO LATE.

-Rm

2006-08-09T14:38:00.000-07:00

Sun, Blunts & Hip Hop

*WARNING: PROCEED WITH CAUTION* (Don't say I didn't warn you...)

When last year's Rock The Bells ended, I told myself, "There is no way Guerilla Union is gonna sucker me into hangin' around for another 14 hour show." But seein' as how I turn into a little kid when I see the line-up every year, I caved in as soon as I saw that Wu-Tang and Black Star were gonna be this year's headliners. So, I found myself sleepin' in early on Friday in preparation for Saturday's (and part of Sunday's...) Hip Hop overdose.

I was gonna post this huge blog recounting my 24 hour day (like Jack Bauer) at Rock The Bells this year, but that seemed a little much so I decided to give you a rundown of what I saw and my thoughts on this year's show. If you're readin' this, I'm warning you now...it's not for the easily offended. Especially you Hip Hop heads out there who are certain fans of certain groups or artists I will mention (and talk shit about) in this blog. You've been warned...

We got to San Bernardino just before 11:00 A.M. thinkin' we would get there just in time, but, as it does every year...the show started late. And, as it does every year, it has to happen directly under the hottest weather possible. But anyway...we finally make it in and run directly to Up Above's booth and buy as much gear as possible. Whaddup to the Visionaries and the whole Up Above crew...y'all are the illest! Thanks for signin' my shirt!!!

Big up to also to my homie Eric (a.k.a. Bumps The GooseGot) and the Verbal Supplement crew for the CD. The Gas Company should be warned...5 bucks is a small price to pay for that much heat...

Anyway, so I missed the first couple of acts but we rushed to the stage just in time to catch Self Scientific...also known as the best duo you've never heard of. STOP SLEEPIN', PEOPLE!!! So they rocked a short set, and then I think I remember Murs comin' up shortly after that. I'm diggin' Murs...he's the only cat from Living Legends that I can actually tolerate. Plus, he did "L.A."...that shit is ill!

My boys, the Visionaries, rocked the spot as always, for about a half. Dope set from the fellas, but that's nothin' new. It would be a mistake if I didn't mention that they're one of the finest acts to see live. You don't see that much energy from most crews. New album October 3rd...don't sleep on that either.

So the next, we thought, would be Dilated Peoples...but instead Del came out. Honestly, I've seen the whole Hiero crew a bunch of times and I probably wouldn't care if I never saw them again. Don't get me wrong, "93 'Til Infinity" is ill and it was just about the only album I dug...but they got other ill joints. Personally, I think the music doesn't translate well into a live show. I don't know...maybe it's just me. I guess it must be, cuz they get mad love wherever I go. That train passed me by.

At this point in the show, I was hungrier than a hostage...plus, a brotha was dyin' of thirst. But we didn't wanna lose our spot close to the stage before Dilated came on, so we hung out thinkin' that they got bumped and would come out after Del. Del finally leaves the stage and we're gettin' hype thinkin' Dilated's just about ready to rock it, then we can go cop one of those shitty $5 burgers that were bein' sold. So Choc, the host, comes up and says "Get ready for the next act......B-REAL!"

WHAT THE FUCK?

I couldn't give two shits about seein' this cat do a set and I was just about ready to bounce...but that hope, the anticipation, of seein' Dilated again wouldn't let go. So we stayed there like three idiots...cuz they had to be comin' up after B-Real, right? WRONG. And I dig and respect Immortal Technique to the fullest, but at this point I had to eat and/or drink somethin' cuzI was gonna pass out and go down faster than Paris Hilton. I hated to leave the stage durin' Tech's set, but I got to chill in the shade, eat and watch him rock it from the back. He did his thing. "Dance With The Devil" is a fuckin' classic.

After Tech, the part of the show that is known as "Sleepy Time" came. Well, at least for my brother and my homie it was. I stayed awake, like a moron...and I only say that cuz it came back to haunt me later. Aesop came up next...and I ain't really a fan of his, so I'll move on. Then...THE LIVING LEGENDS!!!

Whoopty-fuckin'-doo

How these muthafuckas have such a huge following is beyond me. Maybe I didn't get the memo on why these dudes are so "ill", but I guess that train passed me by, too. The story on why I don't like 'em is a long one that I won't go into now, but I've seen 'em live before and I HONESTLY TRIED TO LIKE THEIR MUSIC. But their whole crew, except for Murs, is like a bad stock tip...I LOSE INTEREST.

None of 'em stand out as bein' exceptional emcees...their beats are weak...and the fact that they call themselves "Living Legends" is a fuckin' joke. Sorry guys, but the only Legends I saw came on after you. And whose cocks are they suckin' (besides their own) over at Guerilla Union to get top billing every fuckin' year at Rock The Bells? I saw those dudes sellin' T-shirts and CDs, but yet I didn't see any pillows and blankets. Just an idea for next time I wanna sleep at one of your shows, fellas...

Now, I know that everyone's got their own personal taste in music and Hip Hop heads are VERY opinionated. I'm by no means tryin' to start any kind of wars, but if Guerilla Union wants a dope group to rock it 45 minutes straight without all that talkin' and shit they need to book the Visionaries later on in the day instead of, like KeyKool told me, "after lunch". There are 1,000 other acts that could rock the crowd better. The only reason I mention the Visionaries is because I seen both of 'em on the same bill, and in my opinion they should have switched spots. So to quote Eddie Murphy's dad, "Kiss my ass if you don't like it!!!"

OK...let the flaming begin. I can feel all the LL fans seething with anger right now. Enough of that...let's move on.

Dilated Peoples finally jumped on the stage, and we damn near missed the start of their set cuz we were walkin' around the different booths. This is now around 6-6:30 P.M. in the day. Of course, they fuckin' killed it...but that's nothin' new.

Right after them is when De La Soul came up and...OH...MY! Honestly, I had seen De La before and there's no doubt they are legendary and, even after all these years, they can still blow up the spot. They really made me feel like a little kid again cuz their energy was so infectious. They really fuckin' surprised me with their set. Not to mention that as special guests they brought up Phife from A Tribe Called Quest and Dres from Black Sheep and did it Native Tongues reunion-style! Hearin' "Award Tour" was so ill, and rhymin' along to "The Choice Is Yours" were highlights durin' De La's set. Not to mention that they closed with "Rock Co.Kane Flow"...what more could I have wanted? At this point, I was ready to rock the rest of the night.

That brings us to Redman, who I admire as emcee...but not as a live act. Like I said before, there's just some artists that can't pull it off and I hate to say it but Reggie's been at 3 RTB's and he still has yet to impress me. He did his thing for awhile, but I honestly zoned out and my high from De La began to wear off. I hate when that happens...

My homie KeyKool from the Visionaries came up next to introduce the new freestyle champ to the world. Supernatural did one of the most amazing feats I've ever heard of...the man freestyled non-stop for over 9 HOURS. Much props to Supernat...that dude has never been really, truly appreciated for his skills. He's another cat you must see once in your lifetime do his thang live.

Not to worry though, cuz Black Star was the next act and they had the place jumpin'. Kweli started it off, then Mos came out and they rocked it on the tag team tip. Hearin' those cats do "Respiration" is mind-blowing. That beat is definitely one of the greatest pieces of music ever composed. No lie. Talib was dope, but man...Mos Def is fuckin' amazing. I don't know what it was, cuz I'd seen him before...but his set at RTB was really ill. I think it was the acapella to "Travellin' Man" that did it. And, of course...I was the only dude rhymin' along.

Which brings me to another point I wanted to make. There was A LOT of fake Hip Hoppers in the crowd. I hate to call y'all out like that, but I'm just bein' real. The DJ's were spinnin' the classic, ill, rockin' joints...and it seemed like my brother and I were the only dudes that knew 'em. And he's only 16! I don't pretend to know all the lyrics to every fuckin' classic song, but at least react to what the DJ is playin'...Gang Starr, Biggie, KRS, Slick Rick. Nobody even rhymed along to "Children's Story"!!! What kinda shit is that? I bet if they woulda spun a 50 Cent joint, everybody and their fuckin' dog woulda been singin' that shit at the top of their lungs. And it would piss me off when the acts on stage would say, "Who here loves that real Hip Hop?" and everybody would respond. Y'ALL NEED TO STOP FRONTIN'!!! Now, I ain't sayin' that I know everything when it comes to Hip Hop, but I know enough and I have a deep appreciation and respect for the culture. Most that were at that show didn't...plain and simple. OK, I don't mean to lump everyone in together...but at least from the crowd that was around me, that was the impression I got.

So Mos rocked it, did some new stuff off the new album and bounced. My high came back and I caught my second wind, cuz I ain't gonna lie...rhymin' along to all those songs at the top of my lungs fuckin' wore me out. Plus, the weed smoke gave a nigga a contact high like a muthafucka. It was the regular smoke that got to me too, though. I hate that shit. But the "surprise guest" took so long to come out after Mos that it brought the excitement down again. It was almost a fuckin' hour before they came out. At this point, I couldn't even bend my legs so a bunch of us just sat down right on the ground among hundreds of people standin' around us. But I didn't care...I was mad tired.

There was a drum kit up on stage, so I my first instinct was that The Roots might stop by...but I was wrong. The "surprise guest" turned out to be......Lauryn Hill. Now, when I saw her I thought..."Oh my God...THE FUGEES!!!" So I stood up with the quickness and got ready to bug the fuck out, but it was not to be. It was only Lauryn and I gotta say that I was really underwhelmed. I don't even think the crowd was feelin' it cuz there wasn't much of a reaction when she hit. To be honest, I don't even think half of 'em knew who it was at first. I stood for a little bit, but I quickly lost interest so I sat back down.

Ms. Hill bounced and to my surprise, Wu-Tang came on stage no more than maybe 5 minutes after she left. Once they came on, forget it...I completely forgot about my legs bein' sore. Cappa came out to "Slang Editorial" and I was goin' crazy already. Then the rest of the Clan jumped out and it was on. From "4th Chamber" to "Shadowboxin", "C.R.E.A.M."...you name it, and they did it. If you're down with Wu, then you already know what time it is.

I was so tired at this point that I damn near gave in and wanted to leave our spot and take a seat. But seein' my brother dig his first real concert so much was a great feeling and I didn't wanna ruin it for him cuz I could tell he didn't wanna leave. I hung in there for him and I'm glad I did.

The highlight, or lowlight (dependin' on how you look at it...), was when Steve-O from Jackass and Wildboyz made his way to the stage. They were in the middle of doin' a tribute to Dirty (R.I.P.) with his (Dirty's) mother present (and having just cried cuz the crowd was chanting her son's name) when Steve-O came on and told this whole story about bein' in the same jail cell at L.A. County with O.D.B. He then proceeded to pull down his pants, get buck-ass naked on the stage, do a backflip and swing his balls under his ass Buffalo Bill-style, turn around and show it to the whole crowd. My first thought was for Dirty's mother. They're tryin' to pay tribute to her son, and this dick (no pun intended) pulled some shit like that. They pulled him away, then the Clan went straight into "Brooklyn Zoo"...which brought the fuckin' house down. Right after the song, though, Raekwon brought Steve-O back on the stage was like, "Yo...I didn't appreciate what you just did." Rae made Steve apologize to the whole crowd, Dirty's mom, EVERYBODY...cuz if he didn't, Rae would "Knock your ass out in front of all these people...I don't give a fuck who you are." The fuckin' crowd went nuts right then. I mean, I think Steve-O is a funny guy but there's a time and a place for everything and he shoulda been a little more respectful considerin' that Dirty's family was up there.

Meth and Red went straight into "Da Rockwilder" which threw the crowd into another frenzy and they closed the show shortly after "Triumph" a little while later. All in all, it's an honor to see those cats in person. Hopefully I'll be out in Philly next weekend to catch 'em again...

I won't even go into the whole long story about how The Wu changed my life (cuz they really did...), but they were pretty damn amazing. Their catalog is so insane that they could rock it for 3 hours and not do all their classics. They may not be as dope collectively as they once were, but the legacy that they built made an impact on me (and, more importantly, on Hip Hop) like nothin' else. It's a shame that most young cats now don't understand just what they mean to the game. Before Wu, there was nothin' quite like that...and sadly, there probably never will be again. That's why I'm so thankful that I lived my teenage years during the Golden Age of Hip Hop. We will never experience anything like that ever again...

Here I thought that there was no way that we could top last year's marathon session...but I was wrong. We got back to the car at exactly 2:18 A.M...a little more than 15 hours after we got there. Man, I still don't know how we made it to the end. As soon as I got back home to bed, I thought that I might be gettin' too old for this sort of thing...and maybe I am. No matter what, though, Hip Hop will still always bring out that kid in me that fell in love with H.E.R. almost 20 years ago.

Or until I see the next Rock The Bells line-up in another 9 months or so.

2006-08-09T14:22:00.000-07:00

GIMME, GIMME, GIMME

Y'all young ho's today think this shits's a game
See no matter who I meet, all I get's the same
"Buy me this...take me there", but I'm not you're father
I don't care if my dick's hard and I'm hot and bothered
So pay attention, please...it'd be nice if you listened
Cuz that young pussy ain't worth the price of admission
See, y'all chicks today be the first to say
"I want this...I need that in the worstest way"
Besides bitch, I need another curse to say
Cuz you won't get no brand new purse today
See, y'all young felines can't wait to pounce
And try to take amounts from my bank accounts
I ain't got nothin' on your nails and hair
And I can see how you look at other girls and stare
See you want that bag...them shoes...that Jag
You need a cat to pay that price on that tag...fat chance
You look real good in them black pants
I love your battin' stance, thats why I sat in a trance
But I know first-hand that y'all ho's are lethal
Your souls are transparent, and your clothes are see-through
Don't know me from a hole in the wall, and want to go to the mall
And shoppin' bags, I'm left holdin' 'em all?
I know you and your baby daddy is goin' through it
But like the Belt Parkway, bitch...I "con-du-it"

Y'all must got me confused with one of them young dudes
That can't wait to get their tongue in your cum tubes
A young boy will trick just to squeeze the titty
Cuz he loves your fat ass and he sees you're pretty
But I ain't fazed by no breasts, or no big asses
You got them boys sweatin' like aerobic classes
And NFL rookies with that cash to spend
Will do anything at all to get that ass to bend
And y'all know their stats when they walk in the room
He pushed up...but who's really talkin' to whom?
I know Jay-Z showed you how to do this, hun
Now you runnin' 'round the clubs like "Ooh...this fun"
And dude might not be the cutest one
But your girl's like "You might have to do this one..."
All for the Prada, Louis, Gucci, Chanel
For the right price, even got the coochie for sale
Wear them bras wit' the titties out, thong with the ass out
Give a nigga Hennessy straight, until he pass out
Last night, you did his little crotch solid
Now he woke up and can't find his watch and wallet
And this goes on in any place you go
So why chase a ho who erase your dough?
See, most dudes ain't got the cheddar to spare
It ain't cheaper to keep her, nigga......its better to stare

-Masta Ace

2006-08-09T14:08:00.000-07:00

The Great Divide

I'm lookin' at a chance to change my stars today
Across the platform, but that sure seems far away
You're on the Brooklyn-bound side, lookin' down
I live in Queens, and in between a car just came
So I could, like...give you a sign with my mind, or give a cough
That's corny, but I don't want to find our signals crossed
Or leave it up to chance you just get aboard the next train and jet
And give me more "next-day" regret
So let's take a step to let this be the day we met
In case destiny and fate forget...I got a heavenly engagement set
And I've been tryin' to be an angel, but I've yet to meet my angelette
I'd make a bet with myself, tell 'em to seize the day
Maybe pressure would help...there's seldom an easy way
If ever I felt that I would need to pray
It's safe for me to say it'd be today
So now its like...

I just can't shake the feeling that there's somethin' about you
And I don't want to leave here without you in my life
It just doesn't seem right...
No matter how hopelessly I wish that you would notice me...you don't
Some guys make this look so easy
But that's just not me...
I would've loved to try to cross the tracks
If I had courage, and fortune would've brought me back

Now is there somethin' I'm supposed to do?
That would bring me close to you...and end my single loner blues?
Cause you could think my messy hair and vintage clothes are cute
Or when you stare back, you could think I'm homeless, too
I'm so confused about which road to choose
Take the stairway over to your side, I shout an ode to you
From afar I probably sound like any dude in a bar
And if I transfered I'd create a chance for you to depart
Is it usually hard to do what your heart's tellin' you?
I would've moved from the start if I knew what the smart fellas do
This ain't the brand of love Hallmark cards sell to you
Seldom true, whimsy for the not-so-well-to-do
So help me through all the the self-doubt and cowardice
Walkin' in lead-welded shoes...held down and powerless
To tell the truth, I don't know how I'll come out of this
But if I don't take myself to you, you're gone...and that's how it is

I just can't shake the feeling that there's somethin' about you
And I don't want to leave here without you in my life
It just doesn't seem right...
No matter how hopelessly I wish that you would notice me...you don't
Some guys make this look so easy
But that's just not me...
I would've loved to try to cross the tracks
If I had courage, and fortune would've brought me back

With all these gaps that seperate us, will we meet?
Or will this be another Beat Street, and I'm......
I can't let the anguish over a trek this dangerous
Or whether fate is with me tonight decide we're left as strangers
Who would accept the shameless coward who never tried?
Starin' at a better life on legs and just let it slide
Am I just petrified she won't say yes?
If I measured my reluctance, would my hope weigh less?
Whether I miss my shift, miss my train, or whether or not
It's the same, I still sit in vain...left at the dock
Whatever the cops do, if they catch me or not
I'll measure the cost in knowin' that I let her slip off
So it's ready or not...now or never...across the great divide
I leapt to the bottom and made for my ladies' side
Well, if this is to be the day I died
When judgment visits me, I can truly say I tried

Louis Logic "The Great Divide"

2006-03-29T15:13:00.000-08:00

WHEN MY EYES UNFOLD

I'm damned if I do, but there's too much regret if I don't
So over breaks, I go for broke
Hopin' I don't choke on the hand that's dealt
Hopin' a light holds a flame as the candle melts
And before my time has come
'Til my flame transforms to smoke, my rhyme ain't done
Shit, these Nike soles ain't ever worn out
I'd rap in sign language if my tongue was torn out
And that can be either dedication...or stubborn
Who's goin' against the grain? Check the rugburn
Handlin' my fraction of this friction
Life can be peachy, even in pitiful conditions
Eyes can deceive...lies shape what you believe
So there's no tricks up my sleeves
I leave it to the eye of the beholder
Cuz my skull carries more power than a holster

When my eyes unfold
Keep the lies untold
Keep my soul unsold
Keep the glitter from the gold
Sledgehammer grammar gonna break that mold

They say the rain is gone
This ain't the same ol' song
Sometimes, the rain makes it too slippery to hold on
Whatever can go wrong, usually does
The floor, walls and ceiling can close in so brutally
Usually, that pressure can crack this shell
Unless the floor I stand on folds as well
Only time can tell if I can grow from these wounds
Assume fetal position, wishin' I never left the womb...
But I'm stronger than that...no confusion
Fallin' off your radar's far from my conclusion
My footwork is my groundwork
Diggin' in the dirt to keep my roots in a solid network
But I ain't shakin' hands for the sake of business
Most hands are dirty, ain't worthy of my good wishes
And if that means no juno, that's not my mission
I'm livin' my little dream, regardless of who listens

When my eyes unfold
Keep the lies untold
Keep my soul unsold
Keep the glitter from the gold
Sledgehammer grammar gonna break that mold

I'm a barnacle in a bottle
Hair without a follicle
Moss without a stone
My heart is my home
So excuse me if I speak from it
On many occasions blood, sweat and tears would leak from it
I follow the senses in my gut
Swallow consequences cuz the pros and cons don't always add up
I live and learn, respect I give and earn
Cuz a can couldn't contain the Krylon I spit and burn
You can speak for the thugs, hustlas and playas
And the lowest common denominators
But I'ma sacrafice now for my unborn kids
So he has a chance to sacrafice for his

-Anonymous Twist "When My Eyes Unfold"

2005-10-25T13:48:00.000-07:00

Tears

Tears on the face of the clown
The clown symbolizes modern face of the Red, Black, Yellow and Brown
In the same situation, face down in the pavement, facin'...
A life sentence for tryin' to feed the babies, gettin'...
So close to the money, but so far from the home
So quick to defend somethin' we never owned
Fixin' packages, a product cooked over the stove
For some, it's the only life they know
Is it the fault of the system, or somethin' within us?
Conflicted cuz I know God, but I love bitches
I know wealth ain't everything, but I lust riches
To make the situation better for me and my niggaz
Much as I talk about it, there's gotta be somebody listenin'
In the areas where we ain't got a pot to piss in
There's Black, Latins and Asians in some bad conditions
We livin', the images on television imprison
Life influences children more than politicians and religion...

Tears on the face of the clown
The clown symbolizes modern face of the rapper in front of the crowd
Man, these labels really got it fucked up now
But there's more money than ever, so that's good somehow
CD's ain't holdin' us down
The record industry's fucked up, it's all about them downloads now
Fans figure, "Why pay if the music is free?
Never mind what it's doin' to me."

FUCK THAT...

I give money and time to this game of rap
I love the respect, but I can't get paid off that
I'm tryin' to cash in and get some of that back
Get rich and give some of that back
So the kids listenin' can stop pedalin' crack
'Til the cops stop committin' them heinous acts
Killin' all these people, and blamin' rap
We just can't let 'em get away with that...

-Self Scientific "Tears"

2005-10-10T13:47:00.000-07:00

The Guys' Rules

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now, here are the rules from the male side. THESE ARE OUR RULES!!!

Please note that these are all numbered 1...ON PURPOSE.

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports...it's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. LET IT BE!!!

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And, no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints DO NOT WORK. Strong hints DO NOT WORK. Obvious hints DO NOT WORK. JUST SAY IT.

1. "Yes" and "No" are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissable in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat...you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something, or tell us how you want it done...not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus DID NOT need directions...and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like the Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit...NOT A COLOR. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what "mauve" is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing", we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you're lying, but it's just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. We we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...REALLY.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, basketball or football.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I AM in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know I have to sleep on the couch tonight. But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping...

2005-10-05T14:21:00.000-07:00

47 things you can't live without knowing about me...

1. FIRST NAME?
*Ricardo

2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
*My Pops

3. DO YOU WISH ON STARS?
*Nope...never

4. WHICH FINGER IS YOUR FAVORITE?
*The middle one, cuz it's good for more than just flippin' people off ;)

5. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY?
*Damn...I don't remember...

6. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
*I guess

7. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
*Dunno...

8. ANY BAD HABITS?
*Yeah...but I won't share

9. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING CD ON THE SHELF?
*Hmmm...I don't think I have any. All I carry is HEAT!

10. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
*Hell yeah. I'M THE SHIT!

11. HAVE YOU EVER TOLD A SECRET YOU SWORE NOT TO TELL?
*Yeah. But seriously...who hasn't?

12. DO LOOKS MATTER?
*As bad as it sounds...YES THEY DO. And no...I ain't shallow

13. HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER?
*HIP HOP!!! Yesterday I was in such a bad fuckin' mood...and my music was the only thing that managed to bring a smile to my face. Video games help, too. Oh yeah...and writin' about it to Imee :P Thanks, girl! You're my lifesaver!

14. WHERE IS YOUR SECOND HOME?
*Any Hip Hop show around L.A...which pretty much means the Knitting Factory (haha). And either Stacks or Amoeba. I can get lost in those places for HOURS on end...

15. DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY?
*HELL......NO

16. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD?
*My Atari 2600 (which was later stolen outta our house), my Transformers or my Voltron lions (my parents only had enough to buy me two...the Green and the Yellow). Haha...my cousin used to bring the Black one (which is the torso...the one I ALWAYS wanted) over to my house and we used to combine 'em. So fuckin' Voltron would be standin' there with one arm and one leg. Haha. If he tried to swim, he'd do circles :)

17. WHAT CLASS IN SCHOOL DO YOU THINK IS TOTALLY USELESS?
*Lunch

18. DO YOU HAVE A JOURNAL?
*Used to...

19. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
*No......I ABUSE IT

20. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN A MOSH PIT?
*HELL YEAH...THEY'RE THE BEST!!! Best one was at the Jedi Mind Tricks show. At least 7 fuckin' fights broke out that night. It was stupid, dangerous and uncalled for...AND I LOVED EVERY SINGLE FUCKIN' SECOND OF IT!!!

21. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A GUY/GIRL?
*Damn...TOO long a list to get into. That's my problem...I'M WAY TOO PICKY. But hey...that's me. Ask my homegirl Belinda. She knows what's up :)

22. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES?
*Laker...Lyrik...Primo...Punk Ass...Chulo (haha...thanks Imee!), Ricky. Anyone wanna give me a new one?

23. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
*Already done it. AND I WANNA DO IT AGAIN.

24. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
*Depends on which ones I got on

25. DO YOU THINK THAT YOU HAVE STRONG POINTS?
*Very much so. I have a lot to offer.

26. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR?
*Soft Serve Vanilla or Rite Aid's Black Cherry Ice Cream. Mmm...

27. WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE COLORS?
*Black (until they make somethin' darker) and Blue (any shade of it)

28. HOW MANY WISDOM TEETH DO YOU HAVE?
*Fuck...I dunno...

29. WHO DO YOU MISS MOST RIGHT NOW?
*I think I would have to say......Evelyn.

30. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS?
*That'd be nice...

31. LAST THING YOU ATE?
*Sandwich

32. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
*Hmmm...I think it was Denell.

33. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX?
*Eyes, smile......ass ;)

34. DO YOU LOVE THE PERSON WHO POSTED THIS?
*Love is a strong word. But she's coo' peeps :)

35. HOW ARE YOU TODAY?
*Better than yesterday...

36. FAVORITE DRINK
*Water

37. Favorite sport?
*Football, Baseball, Basketball...don't make me pick just one

38. EYE COLOR?
*Brown

39. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
*No

40. SIBLINGS?
*1 younger brother

41. FAVORITE MONTH?
*August

42. FAVORITE FOOD?
*Pizza. Hot, cold...what have you! It's kinda like sex...sometimes it better than others, but it's never bad. Well, not with ME it isn't...

43. LAST SHOW YOU WATCHED?
*Attack Of The Show

44. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?
*VERY much so. I hate that about myself. And I've gone out with some attractive women...enough to the point where I should feel better about doin' it. But I can't help it...I'm just too damn shy.

45. SUMMER OR WINTER?
*WINTER for the clothes I LOVE to wear, but SUMMER for the clothes WOMEN love to wear ;)

46. HUGS OR KISSES?
*BOTH

47. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS?
*Relationships. DEFINITELY. One Night Stands are never a good scenario...

2005-09-29T16:12:00.000-07:00

RUBIX HUMAN

Life is filled wit' riddles never meant to be solved
Better seen, and not heard...left behind to dissolve
Into a long lost part of our minds
But its inescapable beauty leaves us frozen in time
So we approach and try to make contact
Divin' in head first, when we need to take a step back
And analyze the operation...pick it apart
Use our mind as a shield and wield it to protect our heart
Cuz in life, heart leads us through life's many transitions
And to me, it's about your heart and aspiration, and not your ambition
But these thoughts don't matter as we throw caution to the wind
Cuz urges and lust lead us to that which is forbidden
So we proceed, cuz the excitement of somethin' new is so tempting
We let our guard down and, sooner or later, a comfort starts to set in
Now that riddle we're still tryin' to solve, begins to solve us
And those early feelings become lost, like Moses in Exodus
Feelings that at first we thought could never be felt towards another
Begin to be our undoing, cuz we left our heart uncovered
Nas once said that sleep is the cousin of death, and now I see
That love must be on the next branch of that family tree
But no matter how many times I fall, I can't ignore
That I'm a glutton for punishment, and I'll be back for more
Life is filled with riddles, but I'm willin' to bet
That none are more confusing......than the opposite sex

-RM

2005-09-27T15:14:00.000-07:00

Like Today...

Woke up, got up, near 11 O'Clock
Butt-naked, except I was wearin' my socks
And that's cool, cuz most the time this floor is cold
Stand up and stretch, look around this mess
My place has been a cave since she left me
Make my way to the kitchen, start the coffee
Then dip to the bathroom, begin the "Triple S"
Wash the previous evening off me
Now, out the shower, get dry, shove a Q-tip in my ear
Well, what do we have here?
It appears as if a piece of me has got motivation
Ain't nothin' wrong with a little morning masturbation
Fresh, dressed like fifty cents
Clean and awake, now I'm ready to commence
Spark up the caffeine and nicotine binge
And that's pretty much the pattern of how the day begins
And I read for an hour, maybe a half hour more
Then I put on my shoes and grab my key for the door
Put my headphones on for this world I ignore
Trek down the street towards the record store
Hey bro, how you do? Anything new today?
"Naw, man. How you been? It's the same ol' same again"
Well then, I'll be gone friend. I'll see you around
(Peace) and I'm out, destination...Uptown
In the summer time, the women wear a lot of skin
And if I sit in one spot, I can take 'em all in
Sometimes I even talk to see if I can make one grin
And if not, yo, it's cool I ain't gonna take it personal
From Anne Landers, to Annie DeFranco to orphan Annie
I love all women, but most of 'em just can't stand me
I don't know, maybe it's my hair or my clothes
Or maybe she noticed that you was diggin' in your nose
Either way, it's OK...I wasn't tryin' to get laid
I just wanted to say "I hope you have a great day"
And then she stopped, with a smile that began to blush
"Here, take my number, call me up
I'll come over and make you lunch"
Oooh...
I got up and headed down towards the bookstore
To check the titles that my man Micheal's got me lookin' for
My visit was short, cuz I just couldn't feel
That cat behind the counter, actin' like I'm here to steal
So I dipped back out into a crowd of tattoos,
Pierced body parts and colorful hairdos
And I question, "Did Babylon resemble this?
Are we gettin' any closer to the end of the list?"
A sensuous kiss *muah* placed on Apocalypse
We teach 'em how to make a fist, but not to resist
And I'm wonderin', "How'd we find this position?"
To people of people, and I still love 'em (especially the women)
Onwards to the coffee shop, maybe "Muddies"
For a refill and some sociological studies
See the junkies while they co-exist with the sobers
All the buggin' of bibles, to shruggin' shoulders
And that's when I saw her, sippin' her water
I wanna kiss her mom, just for havin' this daughter
Excuse me, Miss...I don't mean to come across strong
But I've been waitin' awhile, and you've been takin' too long
And she smiled...and I began to blush
She asked if I'd like to go to the bathroom, and make some love
And I got visions of us and the mirror gettin' steamed
And that's the very moment I woke up from the dream

Grrr...

Woke up, got up, near 11 O'Clock
Butt-naked, except I was wearin' my socks
And that's cool, cuz most the time this floor is cold
Stand up and stretch......and look for my soul

In tomorrow, I see no promise
And yesterday was like today...

-Atmosphere "Like Today"

2005-09-07T00:11:00.000-07:00

With Women, It's Always Gotta Be Somethin'

I've never been in a serious relationship
Probably cuz I can't relate to chicks
Nowadays, I'm trapped off
Doin' tracks to blast off
Bein' lonely is a regular thing
My phone don't ring...
I'm up in the lab, composin'
Seems like every girl I've chosen, heart's frozen
Or maybe I don't know how to pick, tho
Seems like every chick I know is out to get dough
And I ain't gotta lot of that, and I don't front about it
You think I'ma be hittin' you off without it?
Crazy...
Where they come off at?
I'ma 'bout to start lettin' these broads know off the bat
If you ain't bringin' nothin' to the table, then leave
Give a dude room to breathe, and then maybe you can proceed
Somethin' real instead of the fake
Somethin' you feel and appreciate
Worth the wait

It's always got to be somethin'

It's like...what the heck is this?
You know I'm really tryin' not to be a pessimist
But on the other hand
I cram to understand your plan
Feminine ways is like a maze with a Minotaur in the middle
Women be thinkin' we all dogs without the kennel
You don't even know what I've been through
Cuz y'all be comin' wit' all types of drama I don't wanna get into
All types of temptations,
With your small waist...and thick hips...
Psssh, man...
Look...
Too much to deal wit', for real
You got too much to deal to see if it's real...or not
A couple of ladies I met was on point, tho
A lot of y'all be gettin' me annoyed, tho
It's like you be tryin' see how many hearts you can break in the smallest amount of time
Or maybe I'm......exaggeratin', but it gets aggravatin'
You talkin' another language, and nobody's translatin'
And you can walk a mile in my shoes
But you can never overstand my blues
And that's real

It's always got to be somethin'

-Kev Brown "Allways"

2005-09-06T14:09:00.000-07:00

Useless Info About Me

Name Four Bad Habits You Have
1. Bein' grumpy when I'm hungry and haven't eaten
2. Bitin' my nails
3. Bein' such a beat fiend
4. I'm way too nice to people sometimes

Name Four Things That You Wish You Had
1. A girlfriend that shares my love for Hip Hop
2. My own apartment
3. Some new (shit, I told some OLD) Technic 1200's
4. More time to accomplish everything I wanna do. Most the time I feel like there ain't enough hours in the day...

Name Four Scents You Love
1. Herbal Essence shampoo. Mmm...
2. Clean laundry (I gotta agree w/ Kerry)
3. The scent of a woman when I get a hug. Mmm...
4. Pizza (sorry, I had Papa John's last night :)

Name Four People That Know You the Best (as of right now)
1. Laura
2. Bernie
3. My parents
4. Evy

Name Four Things You Are Thinking About Now
1. Is Alejandra gonna call me tonight?
2. Hip Hop :) (I'm bumpin' "Time's Up" by O.C. right now. CLASSIC SHIT!!!)
3. Evelyn (even tho she ain't a "thing")
4. Do I have the courage to actually MEET UP with Alejandra in the first place?

Name Four Things That You Have Done Today
1. Thanked the Lord for another day
2. Dropped my brother off at school (it's his first day back)
3. Drove to work
4. Fucked around on myspace

Name The Last Four Things You have Bought
1. Pan dulce
2. Papa John's pizza. Mmm...
3. 2 pairs of Tim's
4. A 6-pack of black Nike socks

Name Four Bands/Groups Most People Don't Know You Like
1. Steely Dan
2. Michael McDonald
3. Prince (hey, say what u want...but his early music was the SHIT!)
4. Stone Temple Pilots

Name Four Drinks You Regularly Drink
1. Water
2. Soda (orange Sunkist is the best)
3. Raspberry Iced Tea. Mmm...
4. Apple Juice, preferably Snapple Apple. Mmm...

Last Words You Said?
"Damn, she was fine..."

Last Song You Sang?
"Lately" by Stevie Wonder. If you only knew how true the lyrics to that song are for me...

Last Person You Hugged?
Ma Dukes

Last Thing You Laughed At?
My Pop's jokey jokes at work, but that's an everyday occurence

Last Time You Said 'I Love You' to And Meant it?
Can't remember...

Last Time You Cried?
'Bout 3 months ago (I think). But I saw "Million Dollar Baby" for the first time the other day and I came REALLY close...and I've NEVER cried at a movie. That one just kinda hit close to home, I guess...

Last Compliment you Received?
"I love what you're wearing" I know it ain't much, but I'll take it wherever I can get it

What's In Your CD Player?
"Reprogram" by Boom Boom Bap Project. Y'all need to stop sleepin' on those cats, man. This is a VERY slept-on album. Worth it just for Jake One's beats alone...

What Color Socks Are You Wearing?
Black

What's Under Your Bed?
AAALLL my fuckin' shoes (I don't know how the HELL I fit all of 'em down there), old Nintendo, old keyboard, some weights...that's about it, I guess

What Time Did you Wake Up Today?
6:30 am

Current Hair?
Look at my pics for that

Current Clothes?
(from bottom to top): Black Nike CB Air Max 2's, black Nike socks, Mecca denim shorts, white Stafford T under my black, white & gray Visionaries shirt, Arnette watch, stainless steel link chain w/ my dog tag that doubles as a watch (YES, it works! EVERYBODY asks me that. Why would I wear it if it DIDN'T? I ain't one of those dudes that rocks FAKE-ASS diamonds in my ears. What kinda shit is that? I just don't get it...)

Current Annoyance?
That this questionnaire is takin' me so long to get thru

Current Longing?
To share this love I feel with that one special female. WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?!?!!? lol. Oh yeah, and I wish I could do more for the victims of Katrina

Current Desktop Picture?
Legend Of Zelda wallpaper

Current Worry?
Nothin' TOO bad right now...

Current Hate?
Our stupid ass President (I gotta agree w/ Kerry again). He couldn't find funding to help those poor folks out in the N.O., but he DAMN SURE found money to start HIS war from one day to the next....right?

Favorite Physical Feature Of the Opposite Sex?
Ass (hehe...)

Favorite Place To Be?
In my ride...rollin' down the street...wit' my music on full BLAST! "2 miles an hour, so everybody sees you"

Least Favorite Place?
Can't really think of one...

2005-08-31T14:58:00.000-07:00

I GOT TA ...

......pick up the mic on the solo tip
......run you down like a polo skip
......rip emcees like a paper bag
......wear a disguise to escape a nag
......go to my shows in a limousine, but
......stay in touch with my inner scene
......keep my house nice and tidy
......learn a lot about the whitey
......buy a house with all my riches
......invest the rest, avoid the ditches
......eat my frank wit' mustard only
......call up a friend when I get lonely
......do enough shows because the rent's due
......get paid cuz it makes "cents" to
......uplift Rap so it's respected
......help all those that are connected
......give a girl enough affection
......turn her heart in my direction
......grab the mic on the stage and
......drop more spice than a Cajun
......smoke emcees like a cigarette
......rap in a style they can't figure yet
......teach the youth that they're capable
......show the ghetto is escapable
......walk soft, but carry a big stick
......wise up and stopped bein' pegged quick
......manifest words so they're understood
......make more noise than thunder could
......play an emcee like a sham shirt,
So step back or your gonna get slammed, squirt
......get on the floor wit' a fly step
......come on strong like a bicep
......ball up my fist, that's my power sign
And emcees clean up ya act, cuz it's shower time
......drop my rhymes like a sandbag
......pick up the microphone and rag
Emcees who try to be better than
......heat up the party like a sweater can
......learn from the mistakes that I have made
......walk whatever path is layed
......let things fall as they may
......live my life by the day
......help out a friend that's in trouble
......tell 'em we all have to struggle
......go to school with the "other" man
......get as close as I can
......knowin' he knows to know him
And then my chance to survive is less grim
......also to have knowledge of self, tho
......learn that plans achieve wealth, yo
......get that wealth for my family
And community and STILL live happily
Not "ever after", cuz life ain't a fairy tale
......stay on my toes and I'll never fail
......carry the crown like a duffle bag
You saw me score and you STILL wanna scuffle?......dang
......admit you gotta lotta heard, kid
You better run, like somebody smart did
......remember the Benz that my man drove
Now it's all smashed up in a grove
......recall the first day he bought it, tho
And as he boasted and posted I said, "So...?"
......say he was the man that was most backed
Ten workers on the Av, sellin' smack
Saturday he made his last mistake, so now......
......buy a suit for his wake, yo

I got ta
Yo, I got ta...

I got ta avoid surroundin' myself with too many materialistic things
But, I got ta live the life enjoyed by the law-abiding Black kings
I got ta motivate others to achieve and become part of this elite group
And that's really what the struggle for equality is all about, troop
I got ta understand the pain and strife of the next man
So I got ta avoid flauntin', showin' off and hi-postin'...if I can
I got ta make sure actions are understood completely by all followers
I got ta convert the color of your shirt from blue to white collars
I got ta close my eyes, ball up my fists and thank God for the freedom of speech
Then I got ta use my knowledge of the English language to write songs...and teach

I got ta
Yeah...I got ta

Masta Ace "I Got Ta"

2005-08-16T10:45:00.000-07:00

FOR NOW, I CHOOSE TO LIVE...CUZ DEATH'S TOO EASY

As I start the first day of my 26th year on this great ball of stress that we call Earth, I must admit...I'm feelin' good. The past year or so has revealed some things in me that I never knew existed. Since May or so of last year, I thought I would never have anything to look forward to anymore. Each new day just seemed like complete emptiness in my life...my world truly was in black and white.

I didn't wanna hear it at that point in my life, but I found that time really does heal all wounds. I got out and explored life with a new perspective on things...and since then, I have to say that this past year has been the most exciting time of my life. I've gotten the opportunity to meet some amazing people...some good and some bad. I could run down a list and name drop about the heads I've met, but I won't do that. First of all, most of 'em probably wouldn't appreciate it (I don't like puttin' someone on blast like that). And secondly...I don't think it would make a difference to any of y'all WHO I've met. Most of them you wouldn't know anyway (not by name, at least...) and it won't mean a damn to any of you. But I know who they are and bein' able to say I've met them at least once in my life means the world to me.

Before, I wouldn't have given myself the opportunity to go out and enjoy myself, to meet new people, but this new lease on life I've given myself has been a blessing in disguise. I'm doin' what I wanna do now and in the process, I've discovered in myself the person that I really am. I don't like to say that I live my life with any regrets, cuz the person I am today is the result of the obstacles I've encountered and the way I've handled that adversity...and I wouldn't change that for anything in the world. But the one thing I do wish I had done differently was taken the time to find my true self instead of puttin' it off. Sacrifices are a part of life...they come with the territory, and in love it's somethin' we all do. That's a sad story for another day, however. I ain't tryin' to think about that today, tho...I'm thinkin' positively. I keep the beats dirty and the thoughts clean :)

I don't usually like to make a big deal about today, cuz that's just not the way I roll. But I must admit...I miss havin' someone to make it a big deal for me :)

Big ups to Evy for doin' that to a certain extent this past weekend...thank you for that. I know how much you went outta your way for me and it's greatly appreciated.

And a VERY special thanks to you, Petty, for bein' the first one to make me feel special today. The fact that you remembered, kept me in your heart and called me from the other side of the world just to say hello today means more to me than you'll ever know. With that, you've given me the best gift. I hope I get it right this time......Molia!

So this is my gift to all of y'all. To everyone that's made an impact, be it good or bad, in the first 25 years of my life...I thank you sincerely. I wouldn't be the dude that stands before you today if our paths wouldn't have crossed. Here's lookin' forward to another 25!

An extra special shout-out to those who've made a positive impact, tho.

When my world was in black and white, it was y'all that taught me how to dream in color again.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Peace, y'all...

-RM

2005-08-09T23:04:00.000-07:00

ALWAYS GOIN', BUT NEVER KNOWIN', WHERE MY FATE MAY LEAD

It's funny how the flow chart of life works...

We wake up every morning (shit, some don't even it make it THAT far...) havin' no idea what the new day has in store for us. Will it be a day full of events that will forever change the course of our own individual existences? Or will it be like countless others that pass on into the recycle bin of our minds, full of INSIGNIFICANT events that will never be recounted again?

What's happening right now, as I type these words with the sound of the TV in the background...will I remember this tomorrow? Are my actions at this very moment setting something ELSE in motion that I have no idea is comin' towards me?

Or do my decisions not even matter at all? Is my path in life preordained? Does a higher Being know my ending before the middle is even written?

I've been on both sides of the fence...and I still have no idea.

It would seem somehow poetic to know that my life is nothing more than a novel being played out on the surface of someone's mind...yours truly being the protagonist (or antagonist, as some would like you to believe :) along side a cast of characters in daily situations, all of whom are nothing more than the figments of some unknown author's imagination.

As I look at the world around me and the people and places it consists of, I wonder, "Are they all a part of MY story...or am I a part of theirs?" That thought is deep, but scary at the same time. Don't we all want to feel like we have a say as to what happens in our lives? That we suffer the consequences of our own decisions...and not someone else's?

But sometimes...I dunno

It seems like there is no possible way my life is planned for me. I've been so privileged to have met many people on this journey (and someone special in particular) who I don't think I would have met otherwise had I not made certain spur of the moment decisions. Or, I should say, had THEY not made certain decisions on THEIR part :)

If I had not met _____ , I wouldn't have met _____ . U know...that sort of thing. But maybe that's a part of the whole scheme. It's just unnerving to know that if I had changed my mind just one tiny bit, maybe things wouldn't have turned out this way. Maybe my path wouldn't have intersected with someone that it was meant to cross with in the first place. Maybe I wouldn't have met that one person that means so much to me.

I figured that maybe typin' out my thoughts would give me some sort of perspective on things, but now I think I'm more lost than ever. So I'll let that thought marinate. Either way, don't be afraid to think outside the box and live a little. If you come to a fork in the road......go straight. When a new path opens up, take it and see where it leads. You never know who you may find...or who's waitin' to find you :)

Our lives may just be short stories in the grand scheme of things, but don't be afraid to snatch the pen and write your own chapter when no one is looking.

Hold ya heads, y'all. Peace...

-RM

2005-08-05T21:54:00.000-07:00

BEEF

Beef is not what Jay said to Nas
Beef is when workin' niggas can't find jobs
City tryin' to find niggas to rob
Tryin' to find bigger guns, so they can finish the job
Beef is when the crack kids can't find moms
Cuz they in a pine box, or locked behind bars
Beef ain't the Summer Jam for Hot 97
Beef is the cocaine and AIDS epidemic
Beef don't come with a radio edit
Beef is when the judge is callin' YOU defendant
Beef, it comes with a long jail sentence
Handed down to you in a few short minutes
Beef is when your girl come through for a visit
Talkin' 'bout, "I'm pregnant by some other nigga..."
Beef is high blood pressure and bad credit
Need a loan for your home and you're too broke to get it
And all your little kids is doin' is gettin' bigger
You try not to raise 'em 'round these wild niggas
Beef is when a gold digger got your seed in her
A manicured hand out like, "Pay me, nigga...
...or I'm tellin' ya wife,
Or startin' up some foul rumor that'll ruin ya life"
Beef is when a gangsta ain't doin' it right
And other gangstas then decided what to do with his life
Beef is not what these famous niggas do on the mic
Beef is what George Bush would do in a fight
Beef is not what Ja said to 50
Beef is Walt and Irv not bein' here with me...
When a soldier ends his life with his own gun
Beef is tryin' to figure out what to tell his son
Beef is oil prices and geo-politics
Beef is Iraq, the West Bank and Gaza Strip
Some beef is big, and some beef is small
But what y'all call beef...is no beef at all
Beef is real life...happenin' every day
And it's realer than them songs that you dated K-Slay
This has been a Black Star P.S.A.
From Mos Def...Pretty Flaco...Black Dante
And the Black Star Embassy...B to tha K

-Mos Def "Beef"

2005-08-05T21:34:00.000-07:00

OOOH...I LOVE THIS GIRL

Since the day I met you, you've understood me.

Some have come and some have gone, but, other than my family, you've been the one constant in my life. At times, I feel that you're the only one that's on my same wavelength.

Ever since the first time I turned you on, we've been inseparable.

At first, you made me feel nervous cuz you were somethin' so new to me and I didn't know exactly how to feel. You were such a breath of fresh air back then...and now it seems that it's the only air I breathe.

When I wake up in the morning, the sweet sound of your voice fills me and let's me know that everything will be OK. You invigorate me and put the movement in my feet. As I shower, dress and get ready for my day...you're there with me. As I close my eyes and lay my head, it's your soothing whispers that put me at ease...

You always roll with me, and as I drive I know that others can hear you...but I don't mind. They look at us sometimes and I can tell that they just don't understand our vibe...that's cool. I hear their girls, too, and unlike you, they're loud, annoying and really ain't sayin' shit; just another flavor of the week. But I know that every once in awhile someone understands what we have, and they nod their head in agreement. They know your steez...

I know so many other brothas be telllin' you that they're diggin' you on a daily basis...but I guarantee you that they don't feel you the way that I do.

They hear you...but they don't LISTEN to you.

I try to tell anyone within earshot how special you are and what your purpose in life really is...but most people don't really care what I have to say. They think they know...but they just got the wool pulled over their eyes.

Through the ups and downs, you've been there with me. Be it lost loves and heartache...I can count on you. People close to me that have passed away...I came to you and you were there at the drop of a hat. When the day has been long and hard, I know that I can pull up a chair, cool out and listen to you. And that's all you ever ask of me...

You embrace me, and the beat of your heart fills my soul with cheer like nothin' else I can describe. Somehow, you always make me smile...

We've laughed together. We've cried together. We sing together and we're always in rhythm.

Sometimes you make me upset when I see the way you let people use you. They claim to know you, but they just say that cuz it's what you wanna hear. Years ago, they wasn't feelin' you...now they try to act like they've been down since day one.

I'm your biggest supporter...but I know I'm also your worst critic. I can be pretty brutal sometimes, but it's only because I care. I'm sorry for doin' it in public and around others, but to those that don't comprehend I say...learn the difference between dissin' and constructive criticism.

I was there for you when nobody was even sweatin' you. They like you for how beautiful you've become these past few years. But I discovered your beauty a long time ago and have come to appreciate you more for your true essence and soul. What seems like an eternity ago now was when you showed me the true meaning...and that was the turning point in my life.

My first eargasm...

You never knew it, but that was the moment that helped mold me into the person I am today. I've done some stupid things in the past, but that's never mattered to you. I can be rich, poor...handsome or ugly; you've always been by my side regardless

I'll admit that over the years you've changed more than I could have ever imagined and, realistically, I know that things will never be the way they used to be when you were golden. But at your purest, I know your soul wasn't made to be lost. And it never will. As long as I'm around, I won't let that happen.

I know I've never told you all this before. It's something that I've kept to myself for a long time, but I know in your heart you've always known my true feelings. But these last few months have been a bitch, and since then I've come to appreciate you more than ever.

I'm startin' to come to the realization that it might just be you and I for the rest of my years, cuz I know that long after I'm dead and gone you'll still be shinin' for all eternity. Just promise me that you'll meet someone that will care for you the way that I did...

But I know that someone out there will learn to love me and understand that I'll still feel about you this way no matter what. Cuz knowin' to love me is knowin' to love you.

You've been there for me when I was doin' the shit I had to do.

You're the love of my life...and that's true.

-RM

2005-08-05T15:53:00.000-07:00

THE NEXT MOVEMENT

Alright, so this is somethin' that I've been meaning to do for quite awhile now. I've been messin' with blogger for a minute and I like it's ease of use much more than the myspace one (plus, it's A LOT easier on the eyes). So from now on, all my blog posts will be done on here. I don't know if anybody will follow me over and actually CARE, but I have fun messin' with this blogger thing, so I hope y'all will enjoy it. Stay up, peeps. One...

-RM